Nobody

[Lailinarel]

So I was advised by a close friend to write down all the things that bother me that I'm unable to tell others for various reasons... the absolute absurdity of it astounded me. Why leave physical evidence of something that isn't supposed to be known to anyone but myself?

(*A page later*)

This was a stupid idea... Why haven't I burned this thing yet?

(*Another page later, with a streak of red on it*)

I'm losing my god damned mind.... There, are you happy? I've written what I'm thinking...

[Lailinarel]

These damn dreams are ridiculous, I'm talking to people who are dead, burying friends alive and running in circles with my head cut off. Years of training and mental blocks all fail when subconscious thought takes control. Bah, they're just stupid dreams anyway.

[Lailinarel]

I had a terrible dream last night... I had my tongue ripped out... and when I woke up I tasted blood... I hate this... I'm supposed to be the strong, collected one... how can I lead others when I don't even know what is going on in my own head?

On a less insane note, that old burn on my cheek is itching like crazy...

[Lailinarel]

*The writing is dark and messy as though written by a heavy, shaking hand*

Another nightmare... the primal gods cried out to me... anguish... fury... I had used their strength in my war on Hakkar... and put it aside when the time came... they spoke of the blessing... and warned of a curse...

Then I was out fighting... I didn't have the old blades... but I had their strength though I couldn't control it... it took hold of me and I slew everything in sight, soldiers, civilians, men, women, children and then I looked down and saw a familiar form... a golden sword and shield on a midnight blue field... one of my own... crushed by a monster... crushed by me...


I awoke in bed and cried for the first time in what has to be more than a thousand years... They were watching... those purple eyes were watching... I'm not scared for myself... but how can I protect my own soldiers from the thing that I am becoming?

I think it was a warning at least...

[Lailinarel]

*This page is written in a sloppy hand, obviously hurried for an unknown reason*

I leave at dawn to continue my search, something is wrong, too many questions to answer, not enough time, no sleep. Duerrak isn't himself, something is wrong with Kaloril, Joringil is obsessed with trying to convinced Danath to return to Stromgarde, Jasonis is missing and that new soldier he sent for me to help train is keeping a secret...

Something is very very wrong, and I am still slowly losing my mind... great timing...

[Lailinarel]

I woke up this morning out in a field in the Arathi Highlands, my armor was in tatters and I was covered in blood. Weapons nowhere to be seen. My hands look as though I had gotten into a boxing match with an anvil. I have absolutely no idea how I got here and the last thing I remember is being ambushed as I entered Stromgarde... but I'm not injured...

What in the hell have I done?