soo..

[Villayna]

This section has calmed down. I'm not really sure what to do with it now. I will probably throw all of the threads into News of the Personal, unless someone has a better suggestion.

I miss him terribly still, but I don't think he'd want people to feel guilty or anything about continuing on with their lives.

[Taknar]

I'm still waiting to hear back from Natasha about her conversation with Rick's Base Chief. Once we have an idea where a memorial bench and go, and what it will cost to put it there, this section will become active with fundraising plans.

[Malorii]

Yeah I agree with that, let's keep this active until we can get the fundraiser thing going for the bench, has anyone else spoken with Skaffies family?

[Izrail]

I would like to keep it open for a while longer, if possible.

[Natasha]

Hi Guys,

I'm still waiting to hear back from the Base Chief about the bench. That could take forever. If you are indeed still interested in placing a memorial bench one could be placed near his resting place, if not at the very site. Just a thought. I can have the arrangements made with the cemetery, all you have to do is say the word. The name of the cemetery is Oakridge Memory Gardens.

I'm sorry for taking so long getting back to you about this.

Take Care.

Natasha

[Taknar]

Hi Guys,

I'm still waiting to hear back from the Base Chief about the bench. That could take forever. If you are indeed still interested in placing a memorial bench one could be placed near his resting place, if not at the very site. Just a thought. I can have the arrangements made with the cemetery, all you have to do is say the word. The name of the cemetery is Oakridge Memory Gardens.

I'm sorry for taking so long getting back to you about this.

Take Care.

Natasha

Oh, it's not a problem at all Natasha! I was feeling sorry for being so curt in our last e-mail, and then continually forgetting to touch base with you.

It's a shame that the Base Chief is so hard to get in touch with. Perhaps there is some sort of petition we can show him on our side that can speed up his communications with his superiors, etc.

[Grainia]

Let me know if there is anything that I can do down here.

[Natasha]

No worries Taknar. Personally, I think it would be easier to place a bench at the cemetery rather than to try to get in touch with the Base Chief. Not to mention, it would be an easier time of it having a memorial placed in his name. There is one option though as far as placing a bench at the Base - Blyx, or Pete as I know him. He's an officer at the Base, perhaps he'd know what to do. Originally, I had asked my Assisting Officer about placing a bench at the Base but it's hard for me to make contact with him as the ship is in and out of port lately due to trials. So perhaps then our next option is Blyx. How does that sound??

Take Care.

[Vilmah]

Sounds good, ma'am. Thanks for your input. :)

[Taknar]

I concur with Vil.

~ Shawn

[Blyx]

Sorry folks, haven't been back here in some time and just saw this particular thread on the bench idea.
For what it is worth, and believe me, I have no say in the matter but can only offer an opinion.
I would drop the idea of having a bench placed on the Base or any other military related area. While the idea is nice, and no one can dispute that, there are just to many barriers that would make the plan painful and perhaps unreachable.
There are many Canadian Forces personnel who pass away, in battle, at work and at home. This could be one of those, if we do it for Rick, why can't we do it for any son/daughter who has died in Afghanistan for eg. This is a touchy subject. It's not always as easy as it seems, fantastic idea but once any detailed planning starts, barriers come up. This is not a matter of the Base Chief giving the nod, he can't do that, it's not his call. He is the right man to approach but this decision lies with someone over his head.
I only mention this because I've seen it before in the past. I have seen photos placed in various locations for a certain period of time as a mark of respect but nothing like a bench. I am not here to say it can't work, only offering advice since my name was mentioned here.
I personally think that Natasha's idea of the bench at the cemetery is more logical, it would be used by Natasha and her family and never forgotten. On the Base, it is possible that hardly anyone knew Rick there so the intended meaning of the memorial bench would be lost over time. Again, a very nice idea, that would never be the issue, just following it through could generate questions and ignites emotions, especially in these times when we are losing soldiers in Afghanistan, as I said, these are touchy subjects.
My humble opinion only here friends. If it were up to me we would have a statue of Rick right it the middle of the field. I just hate to see a lot of hard work and thoughtful ideas on your part fall to pieces.

[Vilmah]

A bench at the cemetery is a good idea, man. I think most of us will definitely donate to that.

[Evanthe]

Thanks for your insight. I agree on the bench at the cemetary.

[Keraph]

On a related but unrelated note, I very randomly found the canadian gold dollar that Rick gave me in Boston before getting back on his boat. I had forgotten that he gave it to me, but I'll be carrying it with me now.

[Blyx]

Keraph, we call that coin a Loonie in Canada because of the Loon that is depicted on it.

[Malorii]

Hey, I have an idea. Instead of a bench what about a tree then? Also, been looking into some other stuff, you know you could have a star named after your loved on so maybe we could name a star after Skafloc. I know cheesy silly.

Or, maybe a recipe book that had recipes of skaffies favorite foods that we can put together? It would be more personal and easier that way. We could have the recipes and keep those with us. Idk.. I'm still having wishful thinking :(

[Jeedup]

Any news on the Blizzard front on attempting to get a form of in game memorial put in yet?

[Taknar]

Malorii, I think the star idea is neat but less "memorial-y", ya know? I'll definately look into it though. Same with the bench for the cemetary. I'll take Peter's advice in this regard (I didn't know the soccer field where Rick coached soccer was on the base :S )

[Malorii]

I sent in my stuff to blizzard but nothing back yet. I've started sending in the fingers of their workers, but the only thing i have gotten is restraining orders .. :(

[Xaraphyne]

Any news on the Blizzard front on attempting to get a form of in game memorial put in yet?

The original thread calling for an in-game memorial was trolled and deleted. I wanted to write a new one but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I did write a letter to a column writer at WoW Insider, hoping to drum up some interest from the community, but he never responded. I don't know if there's enough momentum to get something created in-game.

I think it's that most people would rather not try to play the publicity game of "was he special enough to merit an in-game memorial" with Blizzard. We know he was, and trying to convince peole who don't know, don't care, and would rather cater to the trolling-prone public than a small grieving community is just too exhausting and discouraging.

[Rand_Shea]

I never had much hope for an ingame memorial. It was a nice thought, but... he was known for and loved here, and some people on the internet are bored and insensitive enough to look at something like his death as a nice, fresh, bloody wound to pour salt on to watch people writhe, squirm, and scream in agony as well as anger. Then what do they do? Sit back in their chairs and snicker at the results, then throw more on to watch it all over again.

A memorial bench was the idea I liked the most, and quite frankly I like the idea of it being made by his grave instead of a public area. It'd be for his family and passersby, and no one else. That makes in infinitely more personal and sacred than some bench out in a public area that can be desecrated with graffitti, people spitting on it, or just eventual negligence.

So, don't expect Blizzard or anyone else out there to pay mind or care. He left his mark, but not on everyone.

[Jeedup]

It's been done a few times for players, so I don't see why they would flat out refuse it, especially with a large community backing it up too.

[Taknar]

It's been done a few times for players, so I don't see why they would flat out refuse it, especially with a large community backing it up too.

Examples?

[Xaraphyne]

It's been done a few times for players, so I don't see why they would flat out refuse it, especially with a large community backing it up too.

I know the times you're talking about, but unfortunately, people pass away every day who play the game, and Blizzard simply can't honor every request. Trying to convince them that this one, they should, was a trying endeavor before we even made it past the trolls. While an effort was made, I don't think there's as much momentum as we'd need to see it through. I don't mean to say anyone shouldn't try if they want to, but that was why I didn't have the heart to try again. I think a way to honor Skafloc that doesn't involve having to convince people who never knew him and have no reason to care would be a better way to use our efforts.

[Qabian]

Examples?

Caylee Dak. (http://www.wowwiki.com/Caylee_Dak)

[Vales]

Also...
Ezra (http://www.wowwiki.com/Ahab_Wheathoof) Chatterton (http://www.wowwiki.com/Elder_Ezra_Wheathoof)

[Rand_Shea]

It's been done a few times for players, so I don't see why they would flat out refuse it, especially with a large community backing it up too.

Yeah, but those people had through some means or another gotten the attention of certain organizations that had the spokesmanship to not only suggest the idea, but get the attention of the heads of Blizzard itself to make it happen.

And gestures like that are mostly for PR purposes... how horrible do you think it would have made Blizzard look if they had said "No" to letting a kid who plays their game that's dying of cancer see their development facility and fulfill their wish to be a game designer? Pretty damn heartless, really... and there's a degree of corporate insensitivity that consumers just don't tolerate. Particularly with Americans. The majority might be dumb and easily pleased with shiny graphics and easy quests, but they're also extremely sensitive to sad stories.

An adult having died of cancer... sad, yes, but not on the level that a 10 or 11 year old kid dying from it is.

[Malorii]

I would still like to try and create a cook book of Ricks favorite recipes :(

[Qabian]

Dak Krause was 28. I don't know his story or how his memorial was managed. Perhaps finding out who was involved in that and what they did could be useful if anyone is still trying to push this?

Google says: http://www.boulderfistheroes.com/forums/viewtopic.php?p=14683

Ezra was involved with the Make-a-Wish foundation, and his situation was not comparable.

[opalexian]

I think that trying to help get his works published in some fashion would bring him to Blizz's attention, and then perhaps pushing for a memorial in-game would be easycakes. Just a thought. ; )

[Natasha]

Good Morning Everyone,

I have to say that Blyx, or Pete as I know him, is correct about the obstacles that would be in the way at having a bench placed at the Base. Inintially, I did ask my Assisting Officer about it when the idea was originally presented to me and he said it could be done. However, Pete is right it would a huge obstacle and in the end the answer would be a "No" from the Powers that Be.

The cemetery is just up the road from our home so a bench or tree would be most welcomed and certainly appreciated. There are so many benches throughout the cemetery and even in my grief I can appreciate the memorials dedicated to loved ones. It actually gives me a sense of peace to see that families and friends have had monuments placed for their loved ones.

I've ordered our tombstone. On either side of our family name there will be two doves, below our name there will be a man and woman's hands intertwined surrounded by a heart. Surrounding the heart will be flowers. On one side of the heart will be Rick's name and his dates, on the other side will be my name and of course, eventually my dates. Below it will read, "Living Forever in Our Hearts." When the Spring comes (if it comes-the weather has been so crappy) I've ordered a planting bed to surround our stone. I think I'll plant some Forget-Me-Nots. The children and I think it'll look nice. I know Rick would think so too.

Also, I picked up our Puppy that we had put a deposit on. She's a Nova Scotia Duck Tolling Retriever - the same as our other one who passed away in the Fall. I named her Gracie - that's the name Rick and I agreed on when we paid our deposit to the breeder. Animals are prohibited in the cemetery but I will sneak her in quickly next time I visit Rick.

Anyway, take care.

.......Natasha

[Malorii]

Thank you for writing us natasha, anyway I could convince you to post some pictures of the puppy!

[Natasha]

Sure, I will do that later today. The pictures I have of her are on our other computer. She's darn cute. Rick would love her. I know that he's watching me train her and, no doubt is getting a huge chuckle out of it all.

[Malorii]

Aw! Is she potty trained already, or are you going to have to do that. Also hide your sneakers, puppies have an instinct that tells them to gnaw on anything that has laces!

[Natasha]

She's potty trained. She caught on quickly from the very beginning. She's very hyper, as Duck Tollers are known for. Our Dachshund named Schroeder would often torment out other Duck Toller, Maggie, and drive her nuts. Now it's payback time for poor Schroeder. Gracie drives him nuts. Right now she's playing Leap Frog with him. The poor guy is on his mat at this very minute trying desperately to have a nap but Gracie is tearing around the house and using him as an obstacle course to jump over. Rick would get a huge kick out of their antics.

[Vilmah]

I'm glad you're enjoying your new family member. :) Thanks for the update. If possible, we'd all love to donate to a bench for you and your family and new little friend.

[Natasha]

The fact that you guys even thought of donating a bench in Rick's memory is so kind and thoughtful and I want you all to know how much I appreciate it. Rick would be grinning from ear to ear at your generosity. Knowing my husband the way I do he would say to me that you're all going to way too much trouble and he'd be completely humbled. Thank you all so much.

[Malorii]

Even though we're an online group of people, we're all pretty much like a large dysfunctional family, we spat and bicker every once in awhile, but in the end if something happens to one of our own we pull together and try to make things work out as good as possible, Its how we roll.

Besides, Ricks stories are the best. The best one I remember him telling us was how one of your boys overflowed the toilet and let it go to the morning.

[Taknar]

Natasha, that description of the headstone gave me the most wonderful image. Thanks for sharing it. It also, for some reason, prompted the idea that it would be entertaining the have the symbol of inifinity listed as my dates or my own headstone :D.

I've let this drop by the wayside for far too long. I'll send you an e-mail tonight using the e-mail address you gave me (want to make sure you're still checking it) so that we can go over details. I'll be in touch.

~ Shawn

[Bruuin]

Besides, Ricks stories are the best. The best one I remember him telling us was how one of your boys overflowed the toilet and let it go to the morning.

http://wow-tng.org/showthread.php?t=8000

Was it this one Malorii? For some reason, I distinctly remember this story as well. Maybe it was because it was so soon after I joined the forums. But, yeah.

My parents had something like that happen with one of us. -whistles innocently.-

Anyway, thanks for keeping in touch Natasha. And with a little one of my own on the way, I hope I can be as good of a husband and father as Rick was.

[Natasha]

Ah yes! The overflowing toilet. You know, not much irked my husband. I often told him that he was so laid back about life that I should start checking him to see if he had a pulse. He'd laugh and poke me in the arm. Then one morning his pulse went racing, his face went red and I believe he invented a few new curse words for the English Language when he discovered that our kitchen ceiling was caving in due to our son's negligence and deceit over leaving the toilet running all night. Nice. The only way he can top the anger that he experienced that day is to tell you that the very next week our son broke a window in the front of our house - the week before Christmas. I think he saw blood that day. I guess now is a good time to sing "Thanks for the Memories."

[Gorvena]

Yeah, he shared that story with us. It was classic, and the way he presented it spoke volumes of how he dealt with life in general.

[Malorii]

Ah fun with toilets!

Yeah, Skafloc/Rick is so grounded and down to earth, the only other person that reminds me of his type of personality is my friend ryan, you could brake into the guys car. slash the seats and rip out all the stuffing and brake the window, and chances are he'd thank you for it because it reminded him he needed to have the carpets cleaned, and might as well get the insides in all leather, or something.

[Natasha]

More people should be laid back like my husband. I'm slowly getting there, I've certainly put things into perspective since he passed. Little things that used to bug me are not so important anymore. Basically, I've done a clean sweep of all the stresses in my life to make it easier for me to deal with his passing. When confronted with a dilema regarding our children I often question myself on the way Rick would deal with things. Usually, the answer is simple - he would start off by not getting upset. He was truly amazing at keeping his cool. He had his faults as do I and there were times we wanted to throttle each other. I can honestly say that we had an amazing marriage. Sure, we went through a rough time a few years ago - what marriage doesn't in some way shape or form? However, I can honestly say we've been blessed to have had each other even if only for a short time.
Just the other night I had a dream that he was at the front door, he walked into the house to tell me that he was still here and asked if I was mad at him for lying about passing away. I stared at him - it was actually so vivid because I could see every line on his face - and I said that I wasn't mad, I was happy that he was back and I threw my arms around him and then I woke up. If that were to happen, that's exactly what I would do - be thankful to have him back again. Now, I'm sitting here in tears, wishing that would happen so I'll sign off. Take Care.

[Gorvena]

Wow. I still have that dream from time to time about my dad. My family's prayers are still with your family.

[opalexian]

http://wow-tng.org/showthread.php?t=8000

Was it this one Malorii? For some reason, I distinctly remember this story as well. Maybe it was because it was so soon after I joined the forums. But, yeah.

My parents had something like that happen with one of us. -whistles innocently.-

Anyway, thanks for keeping in touch Natasha. And with a little one of my own on the way, I hope I can be as good of a husband and father as Rick was.

I'm sitting here and laughing and bawling. The floodgates opened finally. Delayed reaction I guess.

Hopefully I'll be in a better place next quarter and will be able to be of a bit more use to finding ways to help get his stories published.

You're the best, Natasha. All our love.